Anytime there are cheaters involved in a relationships, the parties end up asking themselves, “How can I save our relationship?” There are many questions and luckily, just as many answers. All relationships can be saved but, especially when cheating is involved, it takes time. Also, by the time you reach the point that you are ready to save your relationship, you may actually decide that you do not want to save it.

When a relationship ends there is always pain and sadness. When a relationship ends because of cheating, the biggest hurdle to deal with is the mistrust. Once trust has been broken, it is extremely hard to bring back. It may never be fully restored. Although some individuals can put it behind them, others are so impacted by the loss of trust that they can never forgive.

The first step you need to take is to talk it through. This can take days or even months but you need to do what it necessary to save the relationship. It’s important that both of you are completely open and honest about your mistakes and feelings. Discuss what lead up to the affair. Although whoever had the fair may take the brunt of the blame, both partners must be willing to own up to their mistakes. The person who has been cheated on will want to know why and the cheater must be honest about his/her answer. You may be surprised to learn that most people end up having affairs without actually going out and looking for them. Someone may come along at a time that they are feeling empty in the relationship and this other person fills the need that hadn’t been met for a long time. If the cheating episode in your partnership resembles this “unintentional” affair, you can definitely work on getting your relationship back. If the affair was intentionally sought out, then you probably want to consider moving on.

Communication is important in any relationship, even if it is relatively healthy, but especially when an affair has taken place. If you can communicate in a rational way without getting too emotional, it is better but this can be hard, especially in the beginning. Try not to accuse, threaten, or be aggressive. If you try to look at your relationship as something that needs fixing, you can work on how to do that.

Getting back to the question of  “Cheaters-how can I save our relationship?”, there isn’t an overnight solution but there are step by step methods that you can follow. And remember, because there is such a lack of trust, especially n the beginning along with other feelings like guilt, betrayal, anger and depression, you need to be very careful in how you communicate with each other. This doesn’t mean that you need to be dishonest in order to be “nice” but that you do need to try to put yourself in the other person’s shoes as well.

7 Top Signs Of Cheating In A Relationship

If you suspect your partner at all, you should look for signs of cheating in a relationship. Usually if you see smoke, a fire is burning somewhere. So if you have doubt in your partner’s fidelity, there’s probably a reason.

Remember that just because you see signs of cheating in a relationship, though, that doesn’t necessarily mean that cheating is going on. Once you’ve seen the signs, you’ll have to look further to determine if cheating is really happening.

And sometimes there are no signs of cheating in a relationship and yet cheating is going on. It’s not an easy position to be in, to have to figure these things out.

The following signs can certainly lead you one direction or another. Don’t make a decision just based on one or even a few of them. But a lot of evidence can certainly let you know that something may be wrong, and you may want to look at little closer.

•    Secret cell phone conversations are one of the top signs. If your partner leaves the room every time the cell phone rings, you have to wonder why. Were they taught that’s polite? If they’re at all strange acting about the conversation, you should pay attention.

•    Sudden change in hygiene is common when someone is having an affair. If your partner never goes to any special trouble for you to make sure he or she looks and smells good, a change in this could be worrisome. If they’re making themselves nice for you, that’s great. If they’re dolling up to go out, you have to wonder why.

•    More arguments can be one of the signs of cheating in a relationship. Particularly if it seems your partner is starting the argument for no reason and then storming out because of it. It could be just an excuse to leave and have some time away from you without having to come up with another excuse.

•    Catching your partner in a lie can mean trouble. Even the smallest lie shows that person’s willingness to lie in general. Look for connections between that lie and the possibility of an affair.

•    An increase in computer time can be a bad sign. If your partner is spending hours online after you’re in bed or while you’re doing other things, it could be an affair.

•    A common sign of cheating is if your friends act strange. They might know something you don’t and feel uncomfortable around you.

•    And a painfully common sign of cheating is if your partner accuses you of cheating or hints that he thinks you might be having an affair. Very often, that’s a guilty conscious talking and you’re being accused of the thing that’s causing him or her guilt.

The only way to know for sure is to have real evidence. So remember that even though these are common signs of cheating in a relationship, none of them can be used to prove an affair is occurring.

If you have just found out that your spouse has been cheating on you, it is likely that you are on the lookout for answers. The emotions of hurt, anger, sadness and even fear of the future can accompany finding out about a spouse’s infidelity. You may be asking yourself: “How could he or she do this to me?”

The specific reasons for marital affairs range as far and wide as do the people who commit them. Of course, the real reasons for having affair often has to do with how the cheating spouse feels about him or herself: they may be looking for reassurance that they are still attractive and desirable. However, intertwined with this general need for excitement or reassurance is the complex of feelings they feel about their spouse (you, in this case). Often, cheating spouses feel dissatisfied with their marriage.

Here are 5 of the most common causes of marital affairs:

1. You have been taking the relationship for granted lately

If you spent the months or years before the affair began largely taking your spouse for granted, that could be one of the reasons for the affair. Of course, you would have probably not done this to your on purpose – few people do. Rather, we take someone for granted when we assume that they will always be there for us. This attitude toward your spouse can manifest in your not being polite, being good company, or spending enough quality time with him or her.

2. You treat him or her with a lack of respect and appreciation

If your spouse is one of those nice people who always seems to be doing things for everyone else but largely neglecting their own needs, you may have fallen into a pattern of treating him or her with a lack of respect and appreciation. Everyone, no matter how giving or loving, needs to feel that their good deeds are not going unnoticed.

3. You have let yourself go physically

If you have been letting yourself go over the past few years in terms of your physical appearance, that could be one of the reasons for your spouse’s affair. After a couple has been together a long time, it is easy for them to spend less time focusing on their looks. This is unfortunate, because everyone prefers more attractive over less attractive in a mate any day.

4. You have become predictable

Most marriages fall into predictable patterns. The couple engages in the same activities most nights and weekends. Watch the same TV or cable shows. Eat at the same restaurants. This pattern can apply to individuals, as well. Being predictable is one of the steps on the path to becoming boring. If your spouse was going through a time where they felt they needed more excitement in their lives but couldn’t find any with you, they may have sought the excitement elsewhere.

5. You lack new hobbies and interests

As they say, interested people are interesting. If you have kept yourself busy in your marriage with hobbies and other interests, you probably remained a very interesting person. If not, you may have lost a bit of that joy of life that was attractive to your spouse earlier on in your relationship.

Do you think that none of these are “good” reasons for an affair? I would agree with you 100%. Remember, there are no “good excuses” for having an affair – but there are reasons.  And , sometimes the truth is not pretty. But, armed with the truth, you can put yourself in a much better position to mend your relationship after the affair.

Spouses who cheat can leave a wake of pain and emotional destruction behind them. Being cheated on can feel terrible, and when it happens in a marriage it can feel even worse. And when you are cheated on, it brings up a lot of questions about your future. For example: what should you do about the situation? Should you confront your spouse about it? Should you leave him or her?

These are common questions for people in your situation. If you are sure that your spouse is cheating on you, I have put together some guidelines to help you figure out what to do next. Here are 5 signs for when to leave a cheating spouse:

1. They make no effort to hide their cheating
If your spouse knows that you know something serious is going on behind your back but does nothing to correct their ways, this is a clear sign that your spouse at some level does not respect you enough. In fact, if your spouse barely works at trying to cover his or her tracks concerning their cheating, it is time for you to immediately start making plans to exit your marriage. Whether your spouse is trying to give you some sort of twisted signal that they are dissatisfied or whether they just have no respect for your feelings or dignity, either way it is time to say bye-bye to the marriage.

2. They have cheated on you with more than one other person
It may be that your spouse has recently come to you to admit that they have been cheating. Or, maybe you have caught them with another lover, directly or through evidence you have found. Either way, you are now likely trying to consider your options. Here is one thing that should sway you in the direction of a divorce: if you find out that your spouse has cheated on you with more than one other person. In other words, if this is the second, third or more time they have been caught cheating, you have a chronic situation going on that is not likely to mend itself, no matter how sorry your spouse may seem to be acting right now.

3. You find out they have cheated on every person they have been with
Similar to #2 above, if you found out that your spouse is a “cheating repeat offender” with most or all of the other people they have been with, that is a sign that you need to take serious steps toward ending your relationship. People who continue to cheat on those who trust them the most have serious issues that will not likely be fixed through one or two sessions of counseling.

4. You find out they were not having safe sex
Spouses who cheat should at least have the presence of mind and caring for their husband or wife that they wear protection or make their other lover wear protection when they are with another person. After all, with the many diseases prevalent in the world today, wearing protection can mean the difference between life and death. If your spouse has skipped this minimal courtesy, you should consider ending the relationship.

5. They show no remorse when caught
If you caught your spouse cheating, directly or indirectly, they should have immediately begun apologizing profusely to you and tried to make it up to you in any way they could. If they did not, you should take it as a sign that they are basically asking for you to let them go or leave them. Or, at the very least, it is a sign that your relationship is in a very unhealthy place.

On the other hand, if you have found out that your spouse has been cheating on you lately but they have not committed any of the violations to your dignity mentioned above, it may be worth giving them a second chance. In the end, only you know the right answer. If you do decide to try to repair your relationship, be sure to arm yourself with the knowledge you need in order to be successful.

It can be hard to admit to yourself that you suspect your husband or wife may be cheating on you. The potential pain and heartache – not to mention the embarrassment – of this realization would be too much for most people to bear. Still, if part of you thinks that something fishy might be going on, you need to sit up and take notice. Here are 5 signs of cheating in marriage:

1. Your spouse is suddenly buying you more gifts and generally being nicer to you than usual:
After being married for some time, most couples slide into a particular pattern of behavior  that is fairly consistent over time. For example, practices such as giving gifts to each other tends to happen at predictable intervals (e.g., birthdays and anniversaries), with the occasional surprise gift thrown in now and then. Your marriage is likely no different: by now, you basically know what to expect from your spouse in terms gifts and other niceties. So, if your spouse has recently started buying you gifts, bringing flowers, or acting overly nice or affectionate without any apparent reason, it is highly possible he or she is having an affair. This may sound counterintuitive, but it is actually a common phenomenon. Bottom line: a recent explosion in extra-nice or loving behavior from your spouse may be a manifestation of the guilt he or she is feeling about their illicit affair.

2. You feel that something just isn’t right, but may be afraid to admit it to yourself:
We humans have an amazing ability to sense when something just isn’t quite right. It is usually no more than a general feeling that something is wrong, even though the exact issue may not be clear. For example, you may have experienced the feeling in a public place that you were being watched, only to turn and see someone staring intently. This sixth sense or intuition that we all have can apply to our marriage, as well. If your spouse is having an affair, he or she may be acting subtly different in ways that you sense but cannot put your finger on. Trust your instincts and listen to your heart.

3. Your spouse is more irritable than usual and seems to pick fights:
Has your spouse been particularly grumpy lately? Does he or she seem to want to start a fight frequently? Of course, if there are obviously issues in their life, such as a lost job, economic hardship, or problems at work, these could easily explain away the irritability. But, if you cannot identify a particular cause of this strange behavior, your spouse may be unconsciously using their grumpy behavior as a way to distance themselves from you in order to lessen their guilt about an ongoing affair.

4. He or she has picked up new hobbies or habits seemingly out of nowhere:
If your husband or wife has recently started showing a sudden interest in s new hobby  (e.g., tennis, square dancing, or playing checkers) – or if he or she has suddenly picked up a new style of music such as country or hip-hop – this could be a sign that they have a lover on the side. Reason: people in new relationships can be easily susceptible to picking up on the tastes of their new lovers, and they will not hesitate to express those tastes in all parts of their lives.

5. Your spouse is more critical of you than usual:
If your spouse seems to be on your back about seemingly everything lately, this could be a sign that something is amiss. Similar to their need to pick fights with you (see #3), spouses who are cheating try to play on the guilt they feel by justifying their actions through the putting down of their spouse (crazy and convoluted, but true).

If, after reading about these 5 signs of cheating in marriage, you have come to the conclusion that your spouse is cheating on you, you have some decisions to make. First, you need to decide whether you are going to confront your spouse about your realization. If you want your relationship to survive, at some point you are going to need to confront them about it.

Second, if you decide that your relationship is worth saving, you need to seek sound advice from a relationship expert about how to recapture the heart of your husband or wife. I know it can work, because this is what saved my marriage.

Whether you should tell a spouse about an affair is a highly complex and personal matter. Here are 4 items to consider when making the decision for yourself.

Item #1: The ethical dimension: The field of ethics can be divided largely into two camps: the good and the right. The good – called the teleological viewpoint – emphasizes doing what is best in terms of the ultimate consequences of an act. Meanwhile, the right – called the deontological viewpoint – emphasizes the nature of the act itself. In terms of cheating on your spouse: if you are in the first camp (the good), you may feel it best to not mention your indiscretion to your spouse if you feel that your relationship would be better off that way. Meanwhile, if you are in the second camp (the right), you may conclude that right is right, wrong is wrong, and therefore you must tell your spouse about what you did.

Item #2: The social dimension: Revealing that one has cheated can often lead directly to an immediate break-up, since the spouse hearing the bad news may feel that the blow is more than they can handle. However, there is also the larger social circle for you to consider before you tell your spouse: do you have kids? How close are you to your extended families? Do you share many friends in common who would be devastated by a breakup? How would a breakup due affect all of those other people?

Item #3: The psychological dimension: As the cheating spouse, you need to ask yourself the reasons for what you have done. Was it out of a basic lack of respect or caring for your partner? Were you feeling unhappy in your relationship and needed to seek extra attention elsewhere? Or, have you fallen out of love with your spouse? The answers to these questions will point you in the direction of either the need to tell your spouse the truth or to keep things under wraps and just commit to choosing a faithful road moving forward.

Item #4: The physical dimension: If cheating has put you at risk for social diseases such as venereal disease or AIDS, you first need to get yourself tested for these diseases and meanwhile put all sexual contact with your spouse on hold. This aspect of cheating is one of the potentially most threatening to both you and your spouse. Even if the tests show that you are disease-free, you still must keep the potential unknown disease-related effects of an indiscretion in mind as you move forward.

Some people feel that telling a spouse about an affair is an absolute must for any number of the reasons mentioned above, given that for some people there are religious, spiritual, or karmic aspects of confessing the wrongs one has done to others. Others feel that under certain circumstances it is best to put the episode behind you and try to heal the relationship. This is ultimately a very personal decision, but by considering the various dimensions of your decision you will be better informed to make the right one for you.

If your relationship has recently suffered an infidelity, either by you or your spouse/partner, you are currently facing a lot of questions – and likely also a lot of pain. That’s because, whether you are the cheater or the one being cheated on, infidelity in relationships is a sign that the relationship is facing some serious problems.

One day soon, both you and your partner will have to face the issues in your relationship. It is not healthy or advisable to continue an affair for a prolonged period of time. Here is what to do in the case of an affair in your relationship:

1. Before you confront your spouse or partner, get in touch with your own thoughts and feelings first:

If either you or your partner are having an affair, this fact undoubtedly will have a strong affect on how you view your whole relationship. An affair is a sign that there is something very serious going on underneath the surface of things. Whether you want to admit it or not, you are going to need to start the healing process by focusing intently on what it is you are personally going through. If you are the one being unfaithful, you are likely going through some guilt about what you are doing. If you are the one being cheated on, you are probably feeling a lot of anger and resentment, or even sadness. Either way, the first step out of this mess is to come to honest terms with yourself: ask your heart what you really feel and then listen intently to the response.

2. Decide how “deep” you are into it:

Next, do a little bit of fact finding. Determine how long the affair has been going on. Has there been more than one affair? How serious are the feelings for the other lover? Besides the affair, what other parts of your lives are you and your spouse lying to each other about? Finally, rate your situation in terms of how bad things are: with 1 being “we can get through this with a little bit of effort” and 10 being “our relationship is past the point of no return.”

3. Decide how much you want to fix your relationship:

Now that you have really come to terms with where things are, it is time to ask yourself what you are going to do about it. Is your relationship worth saving? Do you still have the love for your partner or spouse that you had when things were at their best – and before the affair started? You need to face the hard questions about where you next steps will lead. This will basically boil down to two choices: toward a wonderful, loving and trusting reunion with your partner or toward a breakup. Even though you are confused right now about what to do, the faster you can determine where things are going the easier your next steps will be to take.

4. Have a heart-to-heart with your partner:

It is time now to have “the talk” with your partner or spouse. Unless you fear that they will become violent or suicidal upon mention of the affair (in which case you should seek professional help first), it is ultimately to everyone’s benefit that you confront him or her directly about the situation. Only by opening up to each other can you really bring the truth to light and get on with healing your hearts.

5. Commit to improving your relationship:

If you do choose to move toward reconciliation with your partner or spouse (see #3), you need to commit at a deep level to improving your relationship. This will mean taking the steps to make things right again. Educate yourself on the techniques, tips and tools that can help you take all of the right steps back toward love.

Infidelity in relationships can be enough to kill the love and trust that the members of a couple feel for each other. Do both of you a favor and make every effort possible to make things better again.

Being involved in an affair can force you to go through a rollercoaster of emotions, from the passion you feel for your lover to the piercing guilt that comes from being unfaithful to the person you are lying to. You might even feel the occasional thrill or adrenaline rush that can come from doing something that is “wrong” by societal standards.

Trouble is, you know it cannot last forever. Being in an affair is like living in a situation of controlled chaos – both exciting and ultimately wearing on your spirit. Not to mention the ethical and moral issues you face.

If you believe it is time to end things with your lover, here are 5 tips on how to end an affair:

1. Do it quickly – don’t put off the inevitable:

While we sometimes hear of the affair that lasts years or decades, most affairs are a relative flash in the pan, lasting maybe a few weeks or months at the most. All evidence points to the fact that affairs must one day come to an end. Your affair is no exception. For every day that goes by that you do not end it, you risk eventually being found out and hurting the one you love. When affairs end that way, usually at least three hearts are broken instead of just two.

2. Be gentle and respectful to your lover during the breakup:

Of course, to end your affair you will have to face your lover with the fact that you want to break things off. That can be a painful thing to do. While you may not want to admit it, you have probably developed feelings of caring and love for your newer lover, as well. In a sense, you now care romantically about at least two people at the same time. Your lover has feelings, too, and those feelings stand to be hurt if you break things off in an insensitive manner. Also, by going easy on your lover, you can avoid some version of the Fatal Attraction situation whereby the jilted ex-lover starts giving you or your family undue attention. So, share the news of your impending breakup to your lover in a way that is gentle and preserves their dignity.

3. Once you cut things off, cut them off completely:

A strong temptation in ending an affair, of course, is the desire to go back to your lover periodically for sex or other types of intimacy – even though you know you should not. This is especially likely if, since breaking off your affair, you have not made much progress in terms of improving the relationship you have with your original lover. So, make a clean break, as they say, and vow to never see your lover in a romantic way again. Then, to fill up the void, get busy improving the relationship you have with the person you cheated on.

4. Change your phone number and e-mail address if necessary:

To really minimize the temptation to stay in contact with your now-ex-lover, try changing your vital contact information, such as your phone number and e-mail address. Doing so will reduce the temptation to contact them – or they you.

5. Decide whether you will tell the person you cheated on about the affair:

The decision about whether to inform the person you cheated on about your affair is of course an intensely personal one. Some people feel that they cannot fully come clean with their conscious unless they tell the person they cheated on exactly what happened. Of course, this course of action in many cases will lead to a complete loss of trust, devastated emotions for all involved, and a breakup of the original relationship. Some people choose to take the secret to their grave, while others choose to tell all. Regardless of the path you choose, you need to come to terms with your decision and then stick to it.

Ending an affair is never easy. But, you may find that doing so is the smartest course of action as you try to heal your mind, body and soul after the experience. Once you have ended your affair, put 100% of your romantic energy into improving the relationship with the person you cheated on. No matter how bad things may seem now, healing between you can happen – I have seen it first-hand.

Having an affair can be life-changing – and usually not for the better. Sure, there is the initial thrill of having a new lover and even the brief excitement of doing something “naughty.” But, having an affair is almost sure to end unhappily for all involved.

Of course, your affair can hurt the person you are cheating on, even if they are not aware of what is going on. Why? Because the emotional and sexual energy you divert from them to your new lover means you are depriving them of what you implicitly or explicitly promised to them. Your husband/wife/boyfriend/girlfriend needs your love, too, and when you have an affair, you take that opportunity away from them.

Of course, one of the worst ways your affair can turn out is that the person on you are cheating on finds out about what is going on without your telling them. In most cases, that leads to an immediate breakup and a lifetime of residual bitterness toward the unfaithful one. Even in those cases whereby the cheater is forgiven for the affair after being found out, the knowledge of the affair usually changes the lives of both people forever. Somehow, the relationship is never the same after that.

If you are thinking about ending an affair, here are important tips on what to do and what to avoid:

What to Do:

1. Be respectful of your own feelings: When you are having an affair and thinking about how to end it, it is easy to ignore your own feelings about what you really want deep down inside. This remains true regardless of which other person in your love triangle you really want. Get in touch with what you want before you start taking action.

2. Remain careful with the feelings of your original lover: The person who potentially stands to get hurt the most from your infidelity is, of course, the person on whom you are cheating. No matter how you choose to resolve your dilemma, it is imperative that you always remain conscious of his or her fragile feelings.

3. Be to-the-point and direct: When you confront your newer lover about your desire to end your affair, make sure you are to-the-point and direct. While you will be tempted to beat around the bush about your intentions, direct is best. Direct, but of course gentle.

4. Cut it off for good: When you do cut things off, make it permanent. If you end the affair but come back later for brief trysts, you will only be prolonging the inevitable.

What to Avoid:

5. Revealing details about your affair: If you do choose to reveal the fact of your affair to your spouse (or boyfriend/girlfriend), make sure to spare them the details of the affair. They will only relive every detail in their minds a thousand times. Spare them the torture.

6. Leaving any room for hope that the relationship could be rekindled: When you break off the affair, avoid giving your lover any shred of hope that you might change your mind in the future. It needs to be complete break.

7. Saying that you will always love him or her: Make sure to avoid saying that you will always care about or love him her : that, too, will breed unnecessary hope (see #6 above).

8. Telling your newer lover that your feelings were never genuine in the first place: When you break it off, you might try to delude yourself or your lover by saying that your feelings were never real. Of course they were real, so do not add insult to injury with this type of lie.

Ending an affair is of course never easy – and every situation is unique. But, if you follow my advice, you will find yourself in a much better place mentally and emotionally to rebuild your original relationship.

If you suspect that your husband or wife is cheating, you are at the least feeling very angry right now. And, it wouldn’t be surprising if the mere thought of their being with someone else makes you feel emotionally devastated.

How can you tell whether your spouse is actually cheating on you? Of course, you cannot just ask them point blank whether or not they are: doing so will likely make them feel very defensive, regardless of what the truth is. And, even if asked, your spouse may just continue to lie (if they are indeed cheating on you) unless you present some indisputable proof that something is actually going on.

So, to help shed some light on the situation, here are 10 signs of a cheating spouse:

1. Their attention seems to drift away from you during conversations:

Spouses that are cheating have good reason to project their focus somewhere away from where you are together: they are thinking about someone else! Of course, if your spouse’s attention drifts away during conversation now and again, that is not cause for worry. But, if you find they are mentally vacant much of the time lately, you just might need to sit up and pay attention.

2. They avoid giving you eye contact:

A cheating spouse is a guilty spouse. No matter how they justify their ways to themselves, I guarantee that if your husband or wife is cheating – they are feeling guilty about it. And, guilty people don’t like to give eye contact, because they are afraid of being found out!

3. There is a sudden change in their spending habits:

Spouses that cheat have to find a way to fund their double-lives. If your spouse always seems to be short on cash for inexplicable reasons, watch out.

4. Your spouse’s clothes carry unusual odors:

Spending time with another lover means having experiences away from you. The smells of restaurants, bars, bowling alleys – wherever they meet – will tend to accumulate on their clothes.

5. You find unexplained receipts laying around:

This ties in with #3: if your spouse is cheating on you, they are likely spending money left and right. Mysterious receipts can act like a paper trail to their guilty deeds.

6. They frequently hang up the phone or end a call when you come into the room:

Spouses who cheat need to communicate with their new lovers. If your spouse frequently acts oddly when you come upon him or her during a phone conversation, be suspicious.

7. They own more than one mobile phone:

These days, it is not uncommon to own more than one mobile phone. Still, if your spouse owns more than one, ask them casually why they need two. Then, analyze the answer to see if it sounds truthful.

8. Your spouse suddenly wants sex more or less often than before:

People who are cheating may desire sex more or less often than they used to. Pay attention to sudden changes in their sexual behavior toward you.

9. They are particularly irritable or want to start a fight:

To repeat, a cheating spouse is a guilty spouse (see #2). Your spouse, if they are cheating, may unconsciously start fights with you in order to “justify” their cheating behavior by making you come across as a disagreeable or unpleasant person. Sounds weird, but it happens.

10. Your spouse suddenly changes their taste in music or clothes:

If your spouse is cheating, they are connected to a pipeline of new ideas and concepts about life from their new lover. That means music, fashion, books – you name it. Watch for signs they are changing their age-old habits in these areas.

If you suspect that your spouse is cheating, you are probably in a lot of pain. Whether you are feeling anger or sadness, both are signs you feel incredibly hurt. It may be hard to imagine your relationship recovering from this kind of a blow. However, there are ways to engage your spouse in an honest dialogue about his or her actions and then to move on to fix your relationship (if that is what you choose to do). Seek help from those who have been in your situation and made things right again.